Mom’s Day Tribute to American Gold Star Mothers (AGSM).

The bond between a mother and her son is truly beyond words.  And when that son goes off to war, his mother could not be more proud … and equally terrified.

But then, for some, in an instant, life ends as they previously knew it.  Maybe they saw the car roll up the drive and the officers get out.  Or perhaps they were surprised by a knock at the door.  In days gone by, telegrams delivered the unwelcome news.  Regardless of the mode, the message remains the same–a mother’s dear son is not coming home.

We call them gold star moms.  In 1928, they organized nationally into the American Gold Star Mothers (AGSM).  In reality, they’re a collection of brave women who have lived their worst nightmares.

World War I

Virgil Winebrenner - 1st Infantry Division

Corporal Virgil Winebrenner served in World War I with the 1st Infantry Division.  The 1st ID would number as our initial entrant into the trenches of France.  Sadly, on November 12, 1917, Winebrenner was killed in action fighting along the Einville Sector.

Within weeks, a fateful Western Union Telegram from the U.S. War Department arrived at the local post office.  As grocer, Al McDaniel tried to locate Virgil’s parents, A.J. and Ella, word quickly leaked throughout town.  Younger brother, Heber first heard the awful news from childhood friends.  He at once thought of his mother.  “Oh boys, don’t tell Mama,” he begged.

A.J. and Ella were understandably devastated.  “Upon learning of my Uncle Virgil’s death in France, my dad (Jesse) told me that Grandma Winebrenner (Ella) developed rheumatoid arthritis almost immediately,” Virgil’s nephew, David, said.  “I never saw her out of a wheelchair.”

In spite of their anguish, A.J. and Ella remained proud of their brood.  “We are deeply bowed in sorrow over the loss of our younger soldier boy Virgil,” A.J. wrote to the local newspaper.  “Yet we have an unbounded degree of comfort in the knowledge that our son has given his life for his country and flag.  We have two other sons, Benjamin, 25 years of age, and Jesse, 23 years old, in the national army at Camp Shelby, Miss., and we feel justly proud that we are the parents of three strong, red-blooded sons willing to fight for their country and home, and to know that one of them did honor to his flag, his parents and himself in making a sacrifice—the greatest and most supreme possible to be made by man, a sacrifice for us also.”

World War II

Ed McGinley - 29th Infantry Division

Infantryman Ed McGinley landed on D-Day at Normandy’s Omaha Beach.  He lived to fight through the hedgerows and beyond.  In late August 1944, he and his unit, the 29th Infantry Division, attacked the German stronghold at Brest, France.  McGinley would not survive.

Word of McGinley’s death took time to reach the family.  “We were coming home from a band concert,” Ed’s sister, Ruth Hiatt remembered.  “It was September 20th, Eddie’s birthday.  Mom said, ‘I wonder what Eddie’s doing on his birthday?’  The next day we got the news that he had been killed.”

“The telegram arrived at the local Red Cross,” Catherine Mawhorter, Ed’s youngest sister, added.  “Reverend Sorenson hand delivered it to Dad while he was at work and offered to go with him to break the news to Mom.  Dad declined, saying that he should be the one to tell her.

“Mom took it so hard.  She was just overcome with grief, just crushed.  …Afterwards, our aunts from Chicago would come down to stay with us.  They were worried about her.  She just couldn’t accept it.  Eddie was her firstborn.  They were as close as a mother and son could get, and now he was gone.”

Eddie’s little brother, Joe was only five years old at the time.  “I remember Mom really being distraught, really upset,” he said, choking back tears.  “But even more than that, I remember my dad crying.  It was the first time I ever saw him cry, and I’ll never forget it.”

The McGinley family was whole no more.  “It was never the same again,” Mawhorter confessed.  “After Eddie’s death, there was always something missing.  Events like Christmas were forever changed.   …There was always an empty seat at the dinner table.”

Members of the local American Legion and VFW posts, along with family and friends, met McGinley’s remains at the train station.   “The train had stopped and the crowd was pretty quiet,” Hiatt said, reliving the moment.  “As they brought his casket out, Mom just let out the loudest shriek I’ve ever heard.  It was so terrible, such an unreal noise—pure pain.”

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Lt. Bob Gage - 307th Bomb Group

B-24 bomber pilot, Bob Gage, served in the South Pacific with the 307th Bomb Group. He and his entire crew were lost in a mission over Balikpapan, Borneo on October 3, 1944. Gage not only left behind a wife and infant son, but also his parents and eight siblings.

“I don’t think anyone will ever forget that,” Tom Gage said of his brother’s death.  “It was a phone call, not a telegram.  I remember Mom picking up the phone.  Then, they told her and she just collapsed and the phone dropped to the ground.”

“It was in the fall of the year because I was out in the field husking corn,” another brother, Fred added.  “… Someone came out and got us with the news.   Mom didn’t get up for about three days afterward.  It wasn’t that she stayed in bed, she just couldn’t do anything.  Dad took it better, at least outwardly.  It took a long time to get over.”

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Ralph Conner - 3rd Infantry Division

Brothers Ralph and Robert Conner both served during World War II.  Ralph joined the Army and fought with the 3rd Infantry Division in North Africa and Southern Europe.  Robert would fight with the 5th Marine Division at Iwo Jima.

Ralph and his unit would take part in the Battle at Anzio Beach, Italy.    On April 24, 1944, Conner was cut down—killed in action.

“We lived about a mile off the road in a log cabin,”  Ralph’s little sister, Lois said.  “I remember being out in the yard when they brought the telegram and read it to us.  Mom and Dad were devastated.  After Ralph was killed, Mom was in bed for two weeks.  It was just so very hard.”

Robert Conner - 5th Marine Division

By late February 1945, Robert’s 28th Marines were fighting north across the interior of Iwo Jima.  Near Nishi Ridge, Conner was hit and killed by an enemy artillery round.

“I’m sure there was a telegram delivered to my family, but I learned of it at school,” Lois continued.  “… My nephew … came bursting into the schoolhouse and said, ‘Bob’s been killed!’  It was just different then.  Everybody knew Bob.  Everybody knew exactly who he was talking about.

“Oh, my parents took it hard.  First one, then the other.  I think Howard, who was their only son left then, was somewhere in the Pacific and they sent him home after that.

“In all seriousness, there was life before the war, then there was life after the war.  And when you lost two family members, they were completely different.  Truly, life was never the same again.”

Vietnam War

Dennis Black - 1st Air Cavalry

Infantryman Dennis Black served in Vietnam with the 7th Cavalry, 1st Air Cav.  He was killed in action on November 17, 1965 when his unit was overrun by an NVA battalion at LZ Albany in the Ia Drang River Valley.

At this early stage of war, casualty-notification teams had not yet been formed.  Instead, random taxicabs delivered death notices via Western Union telegrams, direct to unsuspecting doors.  “At first, we got one that said he was missing in action,” Black’s mother, Evelyn said.  “Then a couple of days later, we got another.  When the taxi driver knocked at the door, it all happened so fast.  We really didn’t know what to think.  We opened the telegram and there it was—the news that he’d been killed in action.  I broke down.  I went to my bedroom and knelt down beside the bed and cried and prayed.”

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Terry Weber-25th Infantry Div.

Foot soldier Terry Weber fought in Vietnam’s Central Highlands with the 25th Infantry Division.  On November 13, 1966, Weber’s unit was ambushed by an enemy battalion at a map spec known only as YA564510.  Weber would earn a Bronze Star for his heroics that day.  But sadly, he died fighting.

At 5:30 p.m., helicopters began evacuating the dead and wounded from the bloodied jungle.  As the dust-off choppers left the scene carrying the day’s fallen heroes, a mother back home sensed the loss.  Call it maternal instincts, Terry’s mother, Martha Weber felt that something had gone terribly wrong.  “I had come home from a birthday party for one of my grandkids,” she said.  “I couldn’t sit still.  Something was bothering me.  I walked and paced up and down the floor that night.  When the two officers showed up at my door, when I saw the soldiers coming up to the house, I knew.  I had felt it the night before.  I knew what they were going to say.”

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Ed Wells - 82nd Airborne Division

Throughout 1968, the Tet Offensive set the course for many would be soldiers.  Eddie Wells was assigned to the 82nd Airborne Division and sent north to Hue, near the DMZ.  On August 29, 1968, Wells was killed by an enemy satchel charge.  He left behind a wife, infant son, parents and one brother.

A notification team soon visited Eddie’s wife, Brenda.  “It was around 8:00 in the morning,” she cried.  “I was alone with the baby.  … I saw the car pull up in the driveway and the Army officer get out and come to the door.  I never dreamed he was going to tell me that.  I thought we were probably going to talk about the insurance for Keith’s birth.  ‘Are you Mrs. PFC James Wells?’ the officer asked.

“And I said, ‘Yes.’  Then he told me that Eddie had been killed in action, just the day before.  I remember I was standing on my Dad’s porch and just kind of leaned back.  I couldn’t believe it was happening.  It was so very unreal.  I was caught completely by surprise.

“Keith had just woken up and I was warming a bottle.  He was crying, so I said, ‘You’ll have to excuse me for a minute; my baby’s crying.’  He followed me into the house.  Inside, I finally began to comprehend what he was telling me.  I just went numb.  There were no words, nothing to describe it—a complete state of shock.  I was trying to change Keith’s diaper, but just couldn’t do it.  I was such a mess.  My body and mind were shutting down.  That Army officer changed Keith’s diaper for me.  It’s one of those things that will always stay in my mind—watching that Army officer change my son’s diaper after he had just told me of my husband’s death.  Keith was only a month and a day old when his daddy died.

“…I believe it was in his last letter to me, he (Eddie) remarked about how small Keith looked in the incubator.  So at least I know that he got to see a picture of him.  But he never got to see his boy in person, never got to hold his baby.”

Happier Times: Marjorie Wells with her son, Eddie and his new puppy.

Wells’ parents, James and Marjorie were out of state visiting relatives when summoned home. “They came in that night and came straight to my dad’s house,” Brenda continued.  “My dad and them sat in the kitchen and that’s when he told them.  But in their hearts, I think they already knew.  Then they moved to the living room because Marjorie wanted to hold Keith.  I think she wanted to be as close to Eddie as she could get, and holding his son was it.  He was sleeping, so I woke him up and let her hold him.  She got to sobbing and crying so badly that I eventually had to take him back.”

Losing a son proved too much for a mother to take.  Marjorie died the next day of a massive heart attack. For the Wells family, one unfathomable tragedy had become two.  To ease the difficult situation, a double funeral was planned.  Marjorie’s body was held as long as possible, but Eddie’s remains had yet to arrive from Vietnam.  With no other option,  mother preceded her son in burial.

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Yes, by all means, have a wonderful Mother’s Day.  But we must never forget those moms who have lost sons and daughters while serving our country, fighting for our freedom.  This Mother’s Day, say a prayer for our American Gold Star Mothers.

2 Responses to “Mom’s Day Tribute to American Gold Star Mothers (AGSM)”

  1. Terri Rocha says:

    As the mother of a Marine, I know a little of what mothers go through when their children go to war. All of the Gold Star Moms (and families) are in my heart and prayers this weekend. I know they are comforted by the knowledge that their child died defending our country, and I pray that God will fill their hearts and lives with comfort. God bless you all.

    • mikemccoy says:

      Terri,

      We certainly appreciate your son’s service in the Marine Corps–his service for us all. Please tell him thanks. And thank you for sharing him with us. Have a wonderful Mother’s Day.

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